Country of origin

I just downloaded the forms to apply for citizenship of the United States.

I think we can safely say I have mixed feelings about this. It's not something I ever intended, or wanted, to do. I'm Irish, and Irish I'll stay. (Though in fact, even saying that sounds uncomfortably jingoistic to me. I was never much of a one for waving the tricolour and dancing the Walls of Limerick; but Irish patriotism can be a different sort of thing. I'm fervently proud of my little country on the edge of the Atlantic, and would defend it like a sibling - that is, to be roundly criticized until an outsider agrees, at which point I would leap to its defense and point out all the wonderful ways in which it's a million miles better than your country, so there.)

I currently have a green card - I'm a legal alien, a permanent resident; I can stay forever if I so wish. I can't vote, and I can't hold office, and I don't get called for jury duty, but I'm okay with that. My children were born here - they have two passports and dual citizenship. But my husband came here first on a student visa, to get his doctorate. Since graduating, his visa has been dependent on his job. He could apply for a green card, but the waiting list is unbelieveably long.

On the other hand, I've been here for over five years, so I can apply for citizenship any time I like. And once I had that, his green card application would be processed in short order. Nothing has changed with his job, but he's a contractor with a year-to-year contract. Nothing is certain in this life, especially for those of us who aren't civil servants. Much as I might carp about how we never meant to stay forever, there's a difference between deciding to go home when the time is right and being thrown out on your ear because somebody decides not to renew your visa.

I have cousins in this country who grew up in Ireland. They're all settled here for good, much more mentally permanent than I am, but their view on citizenship was a pragmatic one when we discussed it. "Just get it," they told me. "Cross your fingers behind your back if you like, but just get it to be on the safe side."

They're probably right. I probably will.