"I'm so glad I have a gun, now I can be like a spy," announced Dash as we negotiated our way through Dublin tolls at dawn on zero-to-two hours' sleep.
"I'm so glad I have an iPhone, now I can be like a normal person," said his sister.
(Please note that neither of her parents have iPhones. We are clearly abnormal.)
A minute later she said, puzzled, "My iPhone doesn't seem to work properly."