- Do not kick off the covers. I am cold. I need that duvet. Especially, do not lie on half the duvet and kick off the rest, so there's nothing at all left for me.
- Do not stick your foot down my pyjama bottoms.
- Do not have sharp, pointy toenails.
- Do not demand a waffle at 3am.
- Do not barf. Ever.
- Do not touch the other nipple. At all.
- Do not hog the bed so that the smaller person takes up 80% of the space, leaving me to wake up perched on one shoulder, wedged against the wall, with my head on your unicorn pillow pet.
**Actually, come to think of it, rules for Daddy are mostly the same, except perhaps for number six. Ahem.