Doing it all. Well, doing some of it and faking the rest.

Okay. So. I was asked, presumably as a result of my five seconds of fame on the BlogHer site last week, to participate in a Blog Carnival hosted at Mom Generations, and sponsored by Eversave. And in return for letting them link to the words of wisdom that I will set out here below for you in one moment, I get to give away a Special Deal from Eversave, which is $50 for a a Mani/Pedi/Fish-y Cure at Yvonne’s Day Spa. 

In fact, the winner gets a package of two, so that they and a friend can go and enjoy being nibbled by fish while their nails are painted for a bargain price. I don't know if you even want to win this, but here we are, and I have to let you know that just by leaving a simple comment, you too can be entered. Yvonne's has three locations in Washington DC, so if you're further afield this might not be much good to you. But hey, comment anyway. Tell me what sort of fish you'd most like to be nibbled by.

And now, without further ado, let me tell you - because apparently Sarah Jessica Parker can do it all in her new movie, to which this whole thing is somehow linked, (and lookee, Pierce Brosnan's in it too; did you know he's Irish? and handsome?) - exactly how I, myself, personally, manage to Do It All.

Well, obviously, I don't. Nobody does. If you think they do, they're just very clever with the sleight of hand and the misdirection and the prioritising. Something is always falling off the end, but that's okay, because so long as you keep your wits about you to some extent, the something is not a small child and the end is not the end of the high-diving board. Doing it all, to me, just means Staying Sane While Staying At Home.

However, I have a couple of tips, if you'd like to hear them:

1. Never do anything at naptime that you could do when the baby's awake. Unloading the dishwasher is out, because that might wake her. Same goes for vacuuming, or cleaning the upstairs bathroom. If this means all you do at naptime is sit down and read a book, that's a really good thing.

2. Invite people over now and then, so that sometimes you have to tidy up a bit.

3. Don't invite people you feel you have to clean the whole house for. People with kids are always a good bet.

4. When having people without kids over, remember to clean the bathroom, if nothing else. It's the only place they're alone and will pay attention. (I read that one in a magazine. It's a Genuine Tip.)

5. Put a drop of vanilla essence in a low oven to make the house smell good.

6. Sorry, wrong list.

7. Believe in karma. What goes around comes around. Especially if it involves snot.

8. Get a good haircut. There's nothing more depressing than going weeks convinced that your hair looks horrible.

9. Don't draw attention to your weak points. Nobody will notice them if you can just manage to keep your big mouth shut. I learned this yesterday, here, and it's a great lesson.

But really, this is the most important one:

10. Have a great team. I couldn't get out of bed in the morning, let alone Do It All, without my husband. I also have a team of co-parents at the playground who watch my kid when I'm too busy gossiping, and a team of cheerleaders inside the computer on whom I can rely for good suggestions, moral support, and space to whinge when necessary.

Now: comments. Go win that fishy spa deal! I'll pick a winner at random on Friday.